loljessie

I dont post on LiveJournal

Sat, 25 Apr 2009 23:07:46 GMT

Because Bobby keeps distracting me.
Dammit Bobby. =D

Yeah this is Bobby and im bored. I love Jessie =D

Jessie Are awesome.

I wish Kristina was not crying right now.

Thu, 23 Oct 2008 20:38:46 GMT

For the longest time I have had so much hope and wishful thoughts and shit. And like, I would always think about what it would be like if that really happened. And then it started to. And after so much thought and time I put into thinking about it, I realized that it was really coming true. I'd always convince myself then change my mind and be like oh wtf no!? But yes wtf yes! And now this. I am not just some thing you go to when you're bored. I hope it stays happy like this for ever ever ever. It won't, it never does.

I like reading Gabby Smith's livejournals :p

Sat, 04 Oct 2008 02:57:22 GMT

So today Amanda was telling me something that really made me realize how bad I DON'T have it. And how someone has it way better than me, but they act like they have the worst life ever. And it really just makes me give them the most disgusting look. Why would you hate your parents when they work so hard for you and are so good to you? I'm not talking about me, because shit, none of my parents have jobs. And my mom's a bitch half the time. But whatever, I still know that my life is not that suckish. Or really suckish at all. Just be fucking greatful, people who aren't greatful are ridiculous.

Anyways, Amanda and I were also talking about Chris and Everrette Cicero are best friends. And how fucking cute they are. Like, they make each other mixed CD's and draw on the CD's and design it and shit. And that is just the cutest thing ever, especially for boys. And if they talked on the phone, hot damn that'd be cute. And Amanda and I are going to be tight like that, and us four as a group are going to be best friends. Because I really like Chris. And Everrette! They aren't like fucking retarded or anything. They don't know about our plan, yet. But they will soon. And they will like it. >:]

Today is my mom's and Justin Andrew's birthday. Normally I call him and tell him happy birthday, but the two of us these days haven't been very good. He doesn't even care about my existense anymore. And here I am wanting to call him on his birthday wishing him a happy birthday? Damn, way to get treated for being someone's "best friend". I'm over that, though. I really am. I've thought about it a lot and I just like the idea and the memories. But OF COURSE nothing will ever be the same again because people are everchanging so once I have came to that realization and accepted it, I have felt much better. The end on this subject. I am happy. :)

I can't stop listening to Brand New. Jesse Lacey is a fucking genius. <333

remember, remember.

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 02:41:52 GMT

I really, really wish my real name was Jessi Gray Andrews. I don't remember how to spell my first name, anymore. I think cheap things are always better, for the most part. If something's too short, I'll just put black tights underneath it. I like old things with special meanings. Unique style interests me. I know I really should not let what other people say get to me. I don't want to have a bad image, I don't want parents or people who don't know me to hate me from what they've heard. I want to be a better person, have a good impact on someone, and make other people want to do good. I want to be happy. Complete, true, happiness. I want it. My back always hurts very bad all the time now. I am my sister's biggest fan. I used to only write with purple pens, but I lost all mine. Also my toes are always really cold. And I normally pee two or three times in an hour. Blake always tells me I'm weird, but I already know that. And I'd much rather be weird than be like everyone else. If you lie to me once, there's a really good chance I'll give you a second chance. But only one. I cannot put into words how much I want to live somewhere big like LA, Las Vegas, California. Somewhere with a lot of style. I love being surrounded by different things. I love a lot. Fair warning. 

I go to Eastern Alamance, I don't like it. 

<img src="http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w264/druggedupjessie/OHYAY.gif" /> 

I want to be me. I am me, I am not you. So if you see me as a whore, whatever, that's your problem. I am not a whore. If you think I'm fake, okay cool. I mean, I don't want to be seen as a fake whore or a skank or a bitch or anything, but if that's what you think. That's great that you're thinking on your own. Don't ever listen to what other people tell you about certain people. Seriously. Get to know them yourself. Everyone has different judgment. Stop being so judgmental and like everyone else, and decide things on your own. But whatever, if I'm a fake whore to you, then so be it. I'll play it out to my fullest. I am me and I'm not changing just so you can leave me truth boxes saying that now you love me. I'm sorry you care so much about me and you're all in my business. And I'm sorry that you're even taking it so far as to make up lies to try to tear me and some people up. That is really immature and I'm sorry you live your life that way. But whatever, I'm not going to bother with you. I'm me and I'm not changing. Cool! 

<big>I have my heart set on seeing Reggie. I still do, it won't fade until I do. Hopefully September 11th, Towson, Maryland is probably the closest. Go read my blog and see if you can help! It means so much to me, you really have no idea. So Kelsey's going to take me if my aunt can't. Kelsey is better than you. <3 </big>

<img src="http://i213.photobucket.com/albums/cc19/jessintheskywithdiamonds/2eq9r3c.gif" />

 <center>
"Its hard to choose between religion & gangsterism"

First week of school.

Sat, 30 Aug 2008 04:01:53 GMT

I want classes with fun people. :(

I am like seriously so miserable. And like I really don't like super clingy people or over protective, worrying people, constantly "WHAT'S WRONG OMG?!" Like I fucking hate that. Do not ask me how I am, or what is wrong. Do not. I hate that. A lot of people do that, stop. Stop it. If I'm mad or upset at you, I'll tell you. If I'm not mad at you, don't fucking worry about it. Unless you're Ktina or somebody who I actually care about. Dani, Caitlan.. a few others..

I LOOOOVE making awkward eye contact with Christ Tatum.

I have a spider bite, I'm pretty sure.

Tue, 12 Aug 2008 06:35:12 GMT

I've been meaning to just sit here and type out all the thoughts I have about Ben and Blake. And how I feel about them. But I can't do it. I mean, I don't feel like getting into that. I am so confused.

Wed, 06 Aug 2008 11:21:05 GMT

Love is just a word and forever means nothing. Nothing can last forever. And the word love has no meaning.

lalala...

Tue, 05 Aug 2008 03:01:47 GMT

I just made a CD full of acoustic Smashing Pumpkins.
:]

Oh my god.

Mon, 28 Jul 2008 23:47:53 GMT

hahahahahaha...

mmmmmmmm

Sun, 06 Jul 2008 01:30:52 GMT

I really like Bethany!
I called Justin Andrews and left him a message the other day. What the hell?

Sun, 29 Jun 2008 17:35:52 GMT

Today sucks. Every Sunday sucks because my mom is a fake bitch. And Jen here just makes it worse.

I'm single.

Sat, 21 Jun 2008 04:05:58 GMT

Ben makes me feel less bad.

Blake x Face: i just like you too much

jessie killz: i like you, too.

Blake x Face: no you dont

Blake x Face: not if you wont date me

Whatever.

Fri, 20 Jun 2008 19:32:19 GMT

I've had a good day. I'm done with crying.

So I have to sit on babies tomorrow to make some cash for camp. I'm excited about the money part. :) And then I get to see Kristina cause it's her birthday and I love her a lot.

Andee left her camera here. Time to camera whore. :D!

D:

Thu, 19 Jun 2008 17:33:39 GMT

Blake x Face: for what?
jessie killz: how mad would you be if i logged on your myspace?
Blake x Face: not mad
jessie killz: k well i did.
Blake x Face: and?
jessie killz: i read your message with hannah.
Blake x Face: ok.
jessie killz: okay, just letting you know.
Blake x Face: and?
jessie killz: nothing..
Blake x Face: oh?
jessie killz: what did you want me to say?
Blake x Face: i dunno
Blake x Face: do you not want to tlak to me anymore?
jessie killz: i never said that?
Blake x Face: im asking do you
jessie killz: you want everyone to like you, but still have a girlfriend..
Blake x Face: i dont want everybody to like me.
jessie killz: then why are you telling hannah she is sexy?!
Blake x Face: long story
jessie killz: i'm sure.
Blake x Face: yeah.
Blake x Face: whatever jessie. you think im some kind of player.
jessie killz: it's kind of hard not to when you tell people they're sexy while you have a girlfriend.
Blake x Face: okay.
jessie killz: so what?
Blake x Face: i dunno
Blake x Face: so?
jessie killz: i don't know.
Blake x Face: do you not want to talk to me anymore.
jessie killz: i never said that!
jessie killz: but look..
jessie killz: i felt bad even talking to another boy, like oh hey how's the weather? and you don't even have a problem telling other girls that they're sexy? that really hurts me :[[
Blake x Face: :/
jessie killz: what?
Blake x Face: i told you that there is a story behind it
Blake x Face: but you dont believe me
jessie killz: okay, can you tell me the story behind it?
Blake x Face: she was just telling me one day how people were talking shit about how she was ugly, and i was like from now on ill call you sexy.
Blake x Face: it was like before me and you started talking.
Blake x Face: but yeah
Blake x Face: jessie?
jessie killz: yeah?
Blake x Face: id unno.
Blake x Face: you stopped talking.
jessie killz: i don't know what to say
Blake x Face: oh
Blake x Face: you just want me to leave you alone?
jessie killz: if you want.
Blake x Face: do you want me to
jessie killz: no. but it seems like that's what you want.
Blake x Face: i didnt say i want to
Blake x Face: but you think im a player so you probably dont like me anymore.
jessie killz: i do. and that's why i'm asking you. i'm really really really upset and it seems like you don't even care.
Blake x Face: i do care.
jessie killz: okay. prove it.
Blake x Face: i dont know how.
jessie killz: why not?
Blake x Face: because.
jessie killz: because you really don't. :[
Blake x Face: i do jessie :[
jessie killz: am i stupid for believing everything you've said to me?
Blake x Face: no.
jessie killz: why?
Blake x Face: because i mean everything i say to you.
Blake x Face: i really like you jessie, a lot.
jessie killz: then why are you hurting me? :[
Blake x Face: i dont know :[
Blake x Face: i didnt mean to.
jessie killz: well you are.
Blake x Face: and i wasnt even being serious by calling her sexy :/
jessie killz: then why would you say that?
Blake x Face: i told you why
Blake x Face: its just a habit now
jessie killz: that's stupid.
Blake x Face: cause i have done it for a long time.
Blake x Face: not really.
jessie killz: okay. well you can call her sexy as long as you want, just now you're hurting me.
Blake x Face: okay, well i wont talk to her anymore then
jessie killz: don't tell me things just to make things okay.
Blake x Face: im not going to
Blake x Face: ill stop talking to her.
jessie killz: :[
Blake x Face: :/
Blake x Face: im sorry for hurting you jessie :[
jessie killz: :[
Blake x Face: i really am >:[
Blake x Face: do you not want to date me anymore?
jessie killz: i do and that's why i'm really upset. :[
jessie killz: but you keep asking me that like you don't want to.
Blake x Face: oh.
Blake x Face: why
jessie killz: why do you keep asking me that?
Blake x Face: no why is it making you really upset
Blake x Face: ?
jessie killz: because i really like you and it hurts tio even think taht you think of someone else that way
Blake x Face: oh but i dont.
jessie killz: do you respect me at all?
Blake x Face: yes
Blake x Face: why
jessie killz: because it doesn't seem like you do.
Blake x Face: i do. i told you that i did.
jessie killz: i know. and i believed you.
Blake x Face: why dont you now.
jessie killz: because i'm sad.
Blake x Face: stop being sad
jessie killz: okay.
jessie killz: thanks?
Blake x Face: i dont know jessie.
jessie killz: me either.
Blake x Face: im pretty much the bigest asshole you can ever meet.
jessie killz: why?
Blake x Face: thats what bekka toldben.
jessie killz: do you think so?
Blake x Face: no.
Blake x Face: i was just mean to her because she talked shit about me.
jessie killz: do you think this is a big deal?
Blake x Face: yes.
Blake x Face: i d
Blake x Face: o
jessie killz: okay.
jessie killz: well what are you going to do about it?
Blake x Face: idk
Blake x Face: :[
jessie killz: :[
Blake x Face: i feel like im loosing you
jessie killz: why?
Blake x Face: because you think im a player
jessie killz: i don't think you'
jessie killz: re a player.
Blake x Face: yes you do
jessie killz: what are you going to do?
Blake x Face: what do you mean
jessie killz: what are you going to do about all of this?
Blake x Face: i dont know
Blake x Face: what do you want me to do.
jessie killz: i don't know. :[
Blake x Face: :/
Blake x Face: im sorry jessie, i know what i did was wrong. and that it hurt you. but i dont want to hurt you. and i dont want you to leave me. becasue everything that i say to you i mean them all. i really like you a lot. and i dont want to break up or anything. i want you to forgive me. and i wont talk to hannah anymore. im not a player, im really not. i dont want you to be upset anymore. i just want you to know im really sorry for hurting you and i wont do it again. :[
jessie killz: i don't care if you talk to hannah, it's not about hannah. it's about any girl. that's disrespectful to me and it really hurts and upsets me and i know you're not a player. but when i read that i got really upset and i don't want to loose you either.
Blake x Face: i wont do it again, i promise. i really do respect you. and she is the only person that i have said that to. its just like a habit. but i dont want to hurt you or lose you. so i wont to it again. i just want you to forgive me, and i want you to be happy. becuase i love you jessie. i truely do with all of my heart.
jessie killz: okay. you won't loose me if you don't do it ever again.
Blake x Face: i wont
jessie killz: okay good.
Blake x Face: yay
Blake x Face: but i feel like a bad boyfriend :[
jessie killz: why?
Blake x Face: becuase i always upset you
jessie killz: well then don't.
Blake x Face: i dont mean to
jessie killz: well you do :[
Blake x Face: im so sorry :[
jessie killz: :[
Blake x Face: :[[[
jessie killz: :[
Blake x Face: im sorry
jessie killz: really?
Blake x Face: yes i really am jessie.
jessie killz: i hope so.
Blake x Face: i am.

:[[

Thu, 19 Jun 2008 01:36:26 GMT

It's all about trust, it really is. Trusting one person and them trusting you. What the fuck was I thinking?

:D

Thu, 12 Jun 2008 14:48:19 GMT

I am so happy right now. Like for a few weeks now. ^_^
I feel so comfortable around Blake, I mean I just texted him and said I had to pee, ahaha, wtf. I really, really reallyyy like him.

:]

Fri, 06 Jun 2008 02:46:16 GMT

Guess who is really fucking happy? Jessie.
Also, guess who passed algebra with a 74? Yeah, Jessie.

Oh, I had a fight with Josh yesterday because he's like a stupid motherfucker and I regret ever dating him. Anyways.. uh, apparently I have a bush, Andee has a swamp, Amanda has a safari, and Dani has a jungle (I think?). Ahah, fuck boys. Not Blake, though. :]

Ballin.

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME?

Mon, 02 Jun 2008 02:32:06 GMT

I was looking through my old Photobucket and I saw a picture of me and Kristina and I burst into tears that sent me into a hysterical crying fit for a good twenty minutes straight. :(

I've had so many different emotions overflowing in my head over the past few days. I've got this amazing feeling all the time now, and it's thanks to Blake. I know it's surprising, and you probably think he hasn't changed, but he has changed, and

Oh my god, it's starting again. D':
Goodnight

This is as quiet as it gets.

Mon, 19 May 2008 04:01:30 GMT

Time is flying by and I can't decide if that's good or bad.
A lot of weird things are happening and going on and I can't decide if it's good or bad.
Probably good, since I'm happy.

Ben was right, I should let go.
Why should you hold onto somebody that was making things complicated much less, making you unhappy? I just don't understand why people do things that don't make them happy, if they're already unhappy. I wish everyone was happy. I really hate seeing people sad.

I need new friends. I want to repair my friendships with people, starting with Chelsei. I want to make new friends and meet one amazing person.

I am very shocked at meeting Ben because his faith is stronger than any fourteen year old I know. And it's amazing how he's not embarrassed of anything. I'm still borderline of him, though. I have my reasons, I know Ben, trust me..

" Sworn off blue lips, kiss them warm
With love comes deep dark red and paper cuts
From letters I re-write explaining how to fall in love
Well, pictures inspire and songs never tire
And there's always clouds to float upon
Saving me best for last
Down for keeps up for grabs
We'll play stop and go
But it feels just like freeze tag"

I'm mad, I hate people.

Tue, 29 Apr 2008 03:04:54 GMT

But today Josh texted me during theatre and was like "Can I have a hug today?" And so I waited for him, and I hugged him for a long time and then some stupid bitch was like "No making out in the hallway!" And I was like "Yeah, look at us making out.." and then we held hands. ^___^

And I took a nap today.
But things don't feel right. I can't describe it, but it's just.. everything. It's like I don't really have a close friend? I don't know, maybe I think this way when I am by myself for too long. I really like nights like Saturday. I hung out with good people and had fun. I want more nights like that. And I want more nights where I have fun and I'm not alone. I don't know, it's weird. :/

http://www.districtlines.com/1939-YAY/automaticloveletter
I want that!

WTFF right when I finished typing this, Josh texted me. ^____^

This is where it ends.

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 03:54:06 GMT

Next weekend will be soooo great. On Friday it will be the best day of my fucking life. I get to see The Used, I know I'll cry. I'll be so happy. I need to start learning the new songs! And on Saturday I get to see Justin in the talent show. He's playing a Walk Through Hell which is one of my favorite songs. I'm so excited because I love Justin so much. And on Sunday I get to see Dani be a baller at her dance concert. She's such an amazing dancer/person. And she gets to read her poem! I will be so, so happy next weekend, like you don't even know.

So tonight Justin called me and we were talking and he said that I replaced him with Dillon. Awwh. :( I didn't, but he's playing, I hope. I love Dillon, but I've never met him before, great!

Would you rather kill me or fuck my dead body?
West wants to kill me.
Dillon wants to kill me then fuck my dead body.
Kristina wants to fuck me, kill me, fuck my dead body.
Justin wants to beat the person fucking my dead body.
Allie just wants sex. :p

So today Donell had a seizure, it was really scary. He just started laying on the ground shaking really hard, making grumble noises, and his eyes were rolling back. It was horrible, but he's okay.

I have been listening to Mayday Parade obsessively lately, because I burned the CD. It's such an amazing CD, well I put both CD's on one. But they are my third or fourth favorite band, I love it.

Do you know what's great? How you think you're too good for me, now. How we never talk anymore, because you've found someone better. How I never even cross your mind for a split second, anymore. Yeah, love you, too.

Dani and I painted my wall. ^_^

I am a baller.

Thu, 27 Mar 2008 05:31:01 GMT

So today Justin told me that Kyle said to him "Justin, you're gonna be mad... I've seen Jessie naked." And Justin was like "What the fuck, no, not Jessie...?" and he was like "lollies yah!" So he showed it to him and it turned out that it was Amanda. So Justin, Kyle, Kyle's friend has seen Amanda's boobs. O_o I feel really bad for Amanda. And I just found out tonight that she's been lying about her and Cody to everyone. They barely went out two days. I talked to Cody's girlfriend as of one year, tonight, and she told me the TRUE story. Wow.

So today I found out that I suck using a Rock Band guitar and I suck at drums on Rock Band, too. I'm good! :p

I STILL have fucking sand down my pants. >:[

Oh, I'm talking to Josh right now. Well, on myspace, close enough. :)
I don't like him anymore. I do not.

Want to hear something cute? I know you dooooo!
Okay, Justin is learning how to play I'll Follow You Into the Dark by Death Cab and I said when he learns how to play it, he will have to bring his guitar and show me. So he said that he would and he would sing it for me, too. So I am going to learn how to play a song and I am going to sing it for Justin. Anyone want to teach me how to play a nice song? I will eternally love you. <3

I need to sleep. Hanging out with Allie and Hunter early tomorrow.

And then she whispered how can you do this to me?

Sat, 22 Mar 2008 04:26:38 GMT

Okay so last night was quite possibly one of the worst nights of my life. Not even kidding. I felt so physically sick that I almost threw up and I couldn't breathe quite a few times. And it was from all the crying and worrying. I just kept picturing the most worse cases.

So the story...
Last night around 10 Noah texted me and was like "Hey do you know where josh is? He's missing and his parents can't find him, he was kicked out and now nobody knows where he's at." I didn't know because of course, we had broken up on Monday and I was really mad at him at the time and I was trying to make it seem like I didn't like him and act like I was having fun in gym while he just sat there looking really sad. So that makes me a bitch, yes I know. So I kind of got a panicky feeling in my stomach as I texted Nathan asking where Josh is. And he called me and further explained. I couldn't even say bye to him I was in such shock. I hung up and started crying so hard. I threw all my stuff in my bags and left to go to Dani's. I tried not to cry in front of my family because they just wouldn't understand. I knocked on Caitlan's door but she was with Blake. :( So as we were driving to Dani's, I kept looking on every single street corner just hoping and yelling in my head WHERE IS JOSH?! And I would have given anything, ANYTHING, to see him with his black hoody (with three pockets :D) on skating down the street. He wasn't there. So I ran into Dani's house and I couldn't hold it, I burst into tears. They just kept falling and falling and then I started becoming shaky and I couldn't stand up and I couldn't support myself and I had to go sit down on Dani's bed. And everyone was texting me like "Jessie, I'm so sorry." And might I mention, the whole texting conversation I had with Nathan all night last night, he apologized every other text. I mean, how could Josh do this to us? He's so stupid, you're never supposed to act on impulse... Anyways. Leah called me but I was too choked up and crying to understand what she was saying. I don't barely even remember answering the phone. I kept thinking "As long as he's okay, I will be to." "I hope he's safe." "Please don't be dead, Josh." and "Josh, what the fuck? You're so stupid." So everyone was like "omg aw jesgay D: D: aww bby" and I'm just like "unless you're Josh, go away." so Dani's mom took us to look for him. We drive around a good thirty minutes and the whole time I was up and down crying. And I could have sworn I saw a police light so that made me get jumpy thinking that they were picking up his dead body as if he got hit by a car. No matter how much I say I freaked out and how much I cried or was worried or shaky, there is no way you can even begin to understand what I felt. It's like taking the ten worst feelings ever and pushing them all into my chest. I couldn't even sit up straight because all I could think about was finding Josh. And I even prayed, can you believe that? I prayed. I said "Please, if you're real, just let Josh be okay. Just let him call one of his friends and say that he is fine. I just need Josh to be okay." And thirty minutes went by and still, nobody could find him. And he ran away because he got in this br00t4l fight with his parents and was kicked out or he ran away or both, I really don't know! All I know is Josh was gone and his phone was cut off. So the whole time I was still blaming myself. And in the back of my mind I thought, "holy fucking shit, I hope he didn't kill himself." because Josh has a really bad home life. He was adopted and his parents just hate him and don't care about him or anything. And he's always grounded so he can never see his friends. So to escape his home, he comes to school and I'm just not talking to him, being mean. I am serious, he has no outside contact with the world, it's horrible. So anyways, back to my story, I thought in the back of my mind that he killed himself and I freaked the fuck out even more. I grabbed Dani's fingers until I couldn't feel mine. We searched all through Fieldstone, E M Yoder, Veteran's Garden, downtown, Winn Dixie, McDonald's, all up and down the main roads. Nothing. It was really sad to try so hard and hope so much and still, nothing happened, so signs. And Dani's mom asked me if I believed in God and I just screamed at her YES YES (I feel bad for being selfish and yelling and probably really mean to everyone, I was just so worried) and she told me then to pray. I cut her off and just kept repeating myself "PRAYING DOESN'T WORK, I ALREADY TRIED AND I DON'T SEE JOSH. IT'S NOT HELPING. WHERE IS JOSH? IT DOESN'T WORK! D:" So we just went home. I wasn't going to sleep until I knew he was okay, but Noah just said try to sleep and that we would search early in the morning. So I slept, surprisingly. And on Saturday, I had this really strong feeling that he was at E M Yoder, because shit bro, if I was going to sneak out, E M Yoder would be pretty ballin of a place to hide. So we looked there, but he wasn't there. Every place we looked that he wasn't, it crushed my heart. So later that day Nathan had called me and said that he came home and he went somewhere with his dad. You do not know how happy that made me. Every negative feeling I had that night and day, instantly dropped. I felt so happy. I was ecstatic. So I still haven't talked to him, but last night has really made me realize what Josh means to me and how much I can lie to myself and say I don't care, but I still need him. I still need Josh in my life. And last night people kept asking me questions and I found out that I really know a lot of who Josh likes and what Josh would do. I'm good. :) I'm still a little sad because I was ignoring Josh and I haven't talked to him since Thursday, but I just have this good feeling that things will get better for "us" and that we'll change and not do the things that annoy each other because now we know. See? Everyone needs second chances.

Well damn.

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 01:28:53 GMT

Jessie: I guess we don't go out anymore.
Josh: Are you breaking up with me?
Jessie: Wtf Josh, way to ignore me all the time and ask my ex best friend creepy questions...
Josh: What are you talking about your ex?
Jessie: Andee is not my best friend. She hasn't been since like this summer. Why would you even talk about that with her? What the fuck.
Josh:I didn't think it mattered because I trust her and I ignored you because I thought you were mad at me and I don't like being accused of using you.
Jessie: You trust her but I don't, Josh. And she told Amanda, that's not trust. And if you ever want things cleared up then try talking to me! Well the way that you're treating me it felt that you were using me so wtf.
Josh: So are we broken up?
Jessie:I guess so. Seems like you don't even care... :(
Josh: How do I not care?
Jessie: I don't know, I figured you would at least not ignore me when I saw you earlier, that was mean. :(
Josh: I thought you were ignoring me. :( I'm sorry... I don't want to break up, do you?
Jessie: Maybe.
Josh: Why?
Jessie: Because Josh! I just don't really feel like I used to and I feel like you don't even care about me or how I feel anymore.
Josh: I do care, Jessie. But if you don't care anymore or believe me when I say I care I don't want to hold you back from bigger and better things and you feel more right about.
Jessie: It's not that I don't care, I just have bad feelings about things. I don't know. :/
Josh: What do you mean bad feelings? This is like our first problem... But if you're not happy than I don't want to hold you back.
Jessie: I really don't know but I just need some time to think about everything and why I have this bad feeling.
Josh: Maybe you're just mad but I don't know, it's not me. :/
Jessie: I don't think it's going to work but I'm still thinking things through.

I wanted to quit using lj.

Sun, 16 Mar 2008 00:45:10 GMT

But I want to make a suggestive post and hope that you get that what you did really hurt my feelings...

And no, I'm not talking about Josh. If I were talking about someone without a livejournal, I would just say their names.

Any guesses?