Because Bobby keeps distracting me.
Dammit Bobby. =D

Yeah this is Bobby and im bored. I love Jessie =D

Jessie Are awesome.

For the longest time I have had so much hope and wishful thoughts and shit. And like, I would always think about what it would be like if that really happened. And then it started to. And after so much thought and time I put into thinking about it, I realized that it was really coming true. I'd always convince myself then change my mind and be like oh wtf no!? But yes wtf yes! And now this. I am not just some thing you go to when you're bored. I hope it stays happy like this for ever ever ever. It won't, it never does.

So today Amanda was telling me something that really made me realize how bad I DON'T have it. And how someone has it way better than me, but they act like they have the worst life ever. And it really just makes me give them the most disgusting look. Why would you hate your parents when they work so hard for you and are so good to you? I'm not talking about me, because shit, none of my parents have jobs. And my mom's a bitch half the time. But whatever, I still know that my life is not that suckish. Or really suckish at all. Just be fucking greatful, people who aren't greatful are ridiculous.


Anyways, Amanda and I were also talking about Chris and Everrette Cicero are best friends. And how fucking cute they are. Like, they make each other mixed CD's and draw on the CD's and design it and shit. And that is just the cutest thing ever, especially for boys. And if they talked on the phone, hot damn that'd be cute. And Amanda and I are going to be tight like that, and us four as a group are going to be best friends. Because I really like Chris. And Everrette! They aren't like fucking retarded or anything. They don't know about our plan, yet. But they will soon. And they will like it. >:]

Today is my mom's and Justin Andrew's birthday. Normally I call him and tell him happy birthday, but the two of us these days haven't been very good. He doesn't even care about my existense anymore. And here I am wanting to call him on his birthday wishing him a happy birthday? Damn, way to get treated for being someone's "best friend". I'm over that, though. I really am. I've thought about it a lot and I just like the idea and the memories. But OF COURSE nothing will ever be the same again because people are everchanging so once I have came to that realization and accepted it, I have felt much better. The end on this subject. I am happy. :)

I can't stop listening to Brand New. Jesse Lacey is a fucking genius. <333

I really, really wish my real name was Jessi Gray Andrews. I don't remember how to spell my first name, anymore. I think cheap things are always better, for the most part. If something's too short, I'll just put black tights underneath it. I like old things with special meanings. Unique style interests me. I know I really should not let what other people say get to me. I don't want to have a bad image, I don't want parents or people who don't know me to hate me from what they've heard. I want to be a better person, have a good impact on someone, and make other people want to do good. I want to be happy. Complete, true, happiness. I want it. My back always hurts very bad all the time now. I am my sister's biggest fan. I used to only write with purple pens, but I lost all mine. Also my toes are always really cold. And I normally pee two or three times in an hour. Blake always tells me I'm weird, but I already know that. And I'd much rather be weird than be like everyone else. If you lie to me once, there's a really good chance I'll give you a second chance. But only one. I cannot put into words how much I want to live somewhere big like LA, Las Vegas, California. Somewhere with a lot of style. I love being surrounded by different things. I love a lot. Fair warning.<br /><br />

I go to Eastern Alamance, I don't like it. <br /><br />

<img src="http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w264/druggedupjessie/OHYAY.gif" /><br /><br />


I want to be me. I am me, I am not you. So if you see me as a whore, whatever, that's your problem. I am not a whore. If you think I'm fake, okay cool. I mean, I don't want to be seen as a fake whore or a skank or a bitch or anything, but if that's what you think. That's great that you're thinking on your own. Don't ever listen to what other people tell you about certain people. Seriously. Get to know them yourself. Everyone has different judgment. Stop being so judgmental and like everyone else, and decide things on your own. But whatever, if I'm a fake whore to you, then so be it. I'll play it out to my fullest. I am me and I'm not changing just so you can leave me truth boxes saying that now you love me. I'm sorry you care so much about me and you're all in my business. And I'm sorry that you're even taking it so far as to make up lies to try to tear me and some people up. That is really immature and I'm sorry you live your life that way. But whatever, I'm not going to bother with you. I'm me and I'm not changing. Cool!<br /><br />


<big>I have my heart set on seeing Reggie. I still do, it won't fade until I do. Hopefully September 11th, Towson, Maryland is probably the closest. Go read my blog and see if you can help! It means so much to me, you really have no idea. So Kelsey's going to take me if my aunt can't. <b>Kelsey is better than you. &lt;3</b><br /><br /></big>

<img src="http://i213.photobucket.com/albums/cc19/jessintheskywithdiamonds/2eq9r3c.gif" />


<br /><br /><center>
<b>"Its hard to choose between religion & gangsterism"</b><br /><br />

I want classes with fun people. :(


I am like seriously so miserable. And like I really don't like super clingy people or over protective, worrying people, constantly "WHAT'S WRONG OMG?!" Like I fucking hate that. Do not ask me how I am, or what is wrong. Do not. I hate that. A lot of people do that, stop. Stop it. If I'm mad or upset at you, I'll tell you. If I'm not mad at you, don't fucking worry about it. Unless you're Ktina or somebody who I actually care about. Dani, Caitlan.. a few others..


I LOOOOVE making awkward eye contact with Christ Tatum.

I've been meaning to just sit here and type out all the thoughts I have about Ben and Blake. And how I feel about them. But I can't do it. I mean, I don't feel like getting into that. I am so confused.

Love is just a word and forever means nothing. Nothing can last forever. And the word love has no meaning. 

I just made a CD full of acoustic Smashing Pumpkins.
:]

hahahahahaha...

I really like Bethany!
I called Justin Andrews and left him a message the other day. What the hell?